Ask first
I enjoy kink, and I have fantasies, and I don’t want people to think I will think less of them for showing me their fantasies or telling me what gets them off. But you have to ask first.
I was molested as a child, and I’ve been raped several times, and I don’t want to have to explain this every time I see a client, but I do want them to understand why there are certain rules that may seem extremely strict. For the most part if you want to ask for something and I say yes, that’s great! But if you are going to do something or say something you need to make me aware of that beforehand so I can mentally prepare myself.
I don’t have trauma that will pop up if I’m in the right place, but if you throw my down and call me a bitch, I will freak out. Obviously you should never ever do this out of the blue anyway because this is sort of rapey, but there are always situations where this may be acceptable if decided beforehand (if you’re sex worker allows it of course).
I am sure every sex worker has had this rant, but I will do it again for myself. If we do not offer a service, if we explicitly say we do not offer a service, WE DO NOT OFFER THAT SERVICE! Do not offer extra money, do not beg, do not ask over and over and over again. This will get you banned.
If you do not know what I offer or what I do, you can ask and I’m completely willing to tell you, and willing to go over everything in a respectful manner, and even to do things if pre-decided, that I will not put up with otherwise. I make it clear though, when taking on new people, that they are not allowed to do certain things without deciding beforehand.
Sorry for the rant, I just wanted to get that out.
