respectsexwork

Personal and Professional Stories of A Working Human

Respect Sex Workers, Respect Each Other

I am an escort.  I have been a hooker, a prostitute, whatever words you want to use.  A whore.  I’ve been pimped, I’ve worked for an agency.  I am currently getting into phone sex and webcam work.  I like doing these things.  I like expressing my sexual nature to people who want to see it.  I like having an outlet.  And of course I like the money.  

It is the only job I can do really.  I love the schedule, I love that I can make my own hours.  I love that I can fit it around my school and parenting schedule.  It’s a great job.

Every type of sex work pays differently, and there are so many levels of each type which all pay differently.  What I like about this is that I am a business person and I like being able to run my own business while also doing something I enjoy, something I find personally fulfilling and something that I think is helpful for a lot of people.  What I hate about this.  It helps keep the hierarchy present in sex work.  The money I make, a lot of it, goes towards my business, and to keep myself clean and safe and “well kept”.  I am maybe lower middle when it comes to how much I charge.  I’m not premium, I’m not cheap.  I don’t make enough to pay for school and childcare.  I make enough to pay my bills.  I am working up to paying for school, and I’m doing this by building my business.  I like this.  I am a fan of having repeat clientele because they like you and because you really did your best.  I like working hard and it is actually a lot of hard work.  Hehe.  I’m so immature sometimes.  So my point though is that I do work hard, I work just as hard as anyone building their business. 

I do think that there are women who get into sex work because they need the money.  I think that there are a few who hate it a few who love it, and really that’s sort of like any job except usually there are a few people who don’t really care about their jobs and then people who hate their jobs and then the small percentage of people who love their jobs.  I think with sex work, because it is more emotionally, and sometimes physically demanding, it’s more of a love or hate type of job.  Especially because we have such major hang ups about sex and human bodies in western culture (and other cultures but since I’m a westerner I can only knowledgeably speak to ours).  For me it is liberating.  I think on my journey going into webcaming I will be even more liberated because I still have body hang ups that are easy to ignore when you are one on one (or two, or three) but when you are on camera to the world (or hopefully just those paying) you are so much more exposed.  Now I prefer one on one because of the pay.  I also love the intimacy and the physical closeness I get to have with it, but I also like the variety that I can do other things like camming, or photos, or phone calls.  Also the safety aspect is something to consider.

I would absolutely love to do exotic dance some day too, although I think that might be harder to do as I get older, but I suppose it depends on the club.  But I’m not ok with my body enough to do that.  I like my body.  Some days I love my body.  But I am not good at dancing and I just felt awkward when I have tried.  

I do have other aspects to my life of course.  I like to sew and knit and I love cooking and gardening.  I have so many passions that I get a bit muddled sometimes trying to do everything.  The reason I do sex work, and I don’t intend to quit (especially if I can do it all legally and not have a fear for myself or my child) is because I had no outlet for my hypersexual nature.  I ended up becoming a very sick person because I had suppressed my sexuality for such a long time.  I don’t mean like raping puppies or anything like that, but I think for some people that is their only outlet.  I think that when you suppress something that is in your nature and such a strong impulse as well, you can make yourself sick and you can cause an illness that wouldn’t be there otherwise.  We can’t all blame pedophile priests on coincidence.  It is not natural for sexual people to be celibate.  Some people are not sexual.  Some people can easily do this.  But that is not everyone and to force someone into that by guilt and by the blackmail that I feel most major religion has over people, is wrong and is dangerous.  I am not anti-religion.  Or maybe I am, but I don’t think I am.  I see people acting in good ways because of their religious guidance, and I see atheists act in awful ways just because they are assholes and not guided by religion.  Anyone trying to oppress another’s nature, must understand that they are creating an illness in that person.  

I think that as a sex worker, I have helped people and I continue to help people with the work that I do.  Of course I also fuck people who just want to fuck.  I’m ok with that too.  I genuinely love helping people though and it’s really the most rewarding part of my job.  Even if you don’t think of it as helping, you just thinking of it as sex, I enjoy it.  I don’t enjoy every fuck, or blow job, or whatever, but I do enjoy it often and I do enjoy the companionship that I can give and the respect that I often get in return. 

I wish I had time to write about how much I love people who see sex workers.  The clients are the other half of this arrangement.  I think they deserve so much love and respect.  (The good clients of course, we can talk about bad clients too, but let’s just look at the good clients – who, for me, are most of the clients I have.)  But I must go.  Off to do some videos.  Then cooking.  Then other fun stuff.  

 

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2 comments on “Respect Sex Workers, Respect Each Other

  1. writingthebody
    May 12, 2013

    You have declared as a sex worker, so I also in my turn declare as a client. I really appreciate the last few lines you wrote. I am currently in a state of confusion, taking a break, I guess, but I really want to go back to one of you guys….I am nearly always treated with great respect and kindness, and I just want from my side also to say thank you to you.

  2. Bambee Wydow
    June 2, 2013

    You wrote “when you suppress something that is in your nature and such a strong impulse as well, you can make yourself sick and you can cause an illness that wouldn’t be there otherwise.” Then I said, YES! Suppressing what comes natural or is desired can result in dis-ease in the body and mind. As long as you do no harm to others [excluding that which is requested by a client] I say do what makes you happy. I also love that you think of your work as helping people. Helping others is not an act exclusive to any one industry or profession. As Vampire Eric from True Blood said to Pam before he turned her [from a hooker/madame] into a vampire, “Your work might not be glamorous but it’s more honest than most.”

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This entry was posted on May 11, 2013 by and tagged , , .

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