respectsexwork

Personal and Professional Stories of A Working Human

Principle, practice and ‘not all men’

Sometimes, it's just a cigar

@prisonerben and I had a discussion last night about, in effect, the utility of insisting that not all men are rapists. Let’s be clear here, so no-one is mistaken. I think it’s utterly useless for any man to do the not all men riff.  Ben equates my position with my asserting that he is variously, a rapist, a semi-rapist or a support of rapists. As you can tell, it was not an even tempered debate.

Here’s the issue of principle. The experience of the women I know and care about, as they have related it to me, is that all men can be rapists, that there is no distinguishing factor that enables them to separate out the rapists from the non-rapists ahead of the fact. If I insist on saying ‘but not me…’ I’m denying their experience, and it’s an experience that is universal and collective. As a matter of…

View original post 369 more words

Advertisements

One comment on “Principle, practice and ‘not all men’

  1. georgefinnegan
    May 27, 2014

    You made an excellent point – everyone should recognize in themselves that they might be a rapist when the conditions arise. If we don’t acknowledge that, then we won’t put any effort into correcting ourselves and we won’t take responsibility for controlling ourselves. That, of course, goes for everyone – including women. I think the best way to fix the issue is education in consent. I saw an excellent youtube video where a very likeable woman demonstrated what consent should look like and how it can change to not consent and what that looks like. Getting more of that out there could be helpful. I also think we should back off a little from promoting the idea that sex is something that everyone NEEDS and because it is a NEED, we have to have it at whatever cost.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Information

This entry was posted on May 26, 2014 by .

Twitter Updates

%d bloggers like this: