I have been through good times and bad times as a sex worker. I have been through self realization moments where I realized I was worth something. Where I realized I was actually helping people by fucking them and interacting with them. Then I’ve also been through times where I felt disgusting. I felt used. I felt horrible. This isn’t only in sex work, but the idea of being used and all the other guilt shit is definitely pushed to sex workers. So while I may have felt less in control and I was payed much worse at my video counter job, I didn’t have that social stigma telling me I was a sick fuck. But while I made more money and was actually usually happy with my work, when I had bad days I felt so much worse about myself because I had been told I was disgusting.
So who tells sex workers they are disgusting? Hollywood. The rescue industry. Religious assholes. Guess what. I am religious. But I don’t go around telling people that they are disgusting because they practice their beliefs differently than my own. Because I believe, even religiously, that that is wrong. I think that everyone knows the basics of right from wrong. Sex, is never a part of that. True consensual sex, is never wrong. Lying, is wrong. Harming someone, is wrong. Rape, is wrong. true consensual sex, is not wrong.
I love my sexuality and I love my super sexual self. I am, to my very core, a super sexual person. I literally want to fuck everyone I admire, and fuck everyone I love. I don’t know if people want to label me as some sort of freak, but this is me. I know me. I am sexual. I love sex and I love people and I love fucking people I love. I also am ok with fucking people I don’t love, for money. I am a super sexual, or hypersexual person. This to me is my life. I don’t think this is bad or good, it’s just me. It isn’t from childhood sexual abuse, it isn’t from anything I can pinpoint, I am just sexual and I don’t think this is bad.
SO. Some religious views obviously make this “bad” “good” bullshit, where my sexuality, especially me being hypersexual and non-monogomous is a super bad thing. I don’t get it. I am me. I enjoy this. I am not hurting anyone and I am having fun in the process. Yes even the bad fucks, even the people I have nothing in common with or the people I find boring, I enjoy the experience most of the time. Isn’t this good? Shouldn’t me enjoying my life, enjoying my work, enjoying my interactions, isn’t this essentially, a good thing? I like figuring people out. I like making them comfortable, making them feel special. I don’t get why this would be a bad thing, and yet…
So, I just want to say, I think I can be a solid, good, amazing, part of society, and not be a problem. Why try and criminalize me and people like me? Please don’t. Please just let us get on with our day, as we do with yours. This is what I want to do. I don’t want saving, I don’t want lectures, I just want to work. I want to live. That is all.